Entertainment
My cat is a free loader
Tuesday, 04 September 2007 00:30
Seriously, my cat is taking advantage of me. I had to pay a special visit to Petco earlier today for more cat food. Petco's honest slogan should be "It's where your money goes."
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Some notes on talking dirty
Tuesday, 21 August 2007 00:00
With nearly a decade of varied sexual experience with a modest number of partners I’ve determined myself uncomfortable with a certain manner of coital conversing. Because I recognize that I will encounter more dirty talkers in my future sexual endeavors- because they mask themselves as intelligent men with impressive, or at least inoffensive, vocabularies
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Dear Dog: just take a shit already
Monday, 20 August 2007 23:35
Ok Dog, we need to talk.

Every time I take you out for a shit, the exact same series of events happen:
I get the blue leash and clip it to you
we go outside
I say "go potty"
you take a shit
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Facebook: I Love to Hate You
Monday, 20 August 2007 23:32
Dear Facebook,

I love the way you have connected me with old friends from high school and I love the way you allow my friends to keep me up to date the with the weekends activities. Ever since I signed up for you I am no longer a social misfit but a prima donna in the world of drunken cottaging and the Queen of Underground Karaoke parties at the Bytown.
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Rant: To the 23 year old girl I met at the bar
Monday, 20 August 2007 23:30
After a long chat about life, politics, and your future career in interior design, you asked me, a man nearly a decade your senior, something like, "What have you learned over the last ten years that you think I should know?" I offered some boilerplate platitude like, "Don't limit your options because you never know where you'll end up." I'm sorry. 
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